The house, noiseless. The room, dimly lit by a single table-top lamp. Throughout our home, everyone is resting comfortably, unmindful of anything but the hush of the night. All is as it should be – a seemingly quiet, peaceful night.
I hold a precious baby girl in my arms as she sleeps soundly on my chest. I tarry, alone in my thoughts, as the tears flow from somewhere deep within. I don’t bother stopping them.
My mind drifts to loss. To the many who have said goodbye to someone they love. To others who are preparing to do so even now, as I write.
I think of my own family. Praying desperately for God to spare the life of my grandson even as my heart breaks for others who must let their little one go. The pain that accompanies such heartache is unimaginable. Yet I dare to imagine it, knowing their reality could someday be my own; knowing none of us is immune.
So I allow myself to go there tonight, if only for a short while. I cannot bear to linger in that place long. As my tears fall, I long to hold that little boy of ours. To sneak in a quick hug; to “dance” with him as I stand by his bedside, his head gently resting on my shoulder; to kiss his sweet face; to hold his tiny hands in mine.
And as I think on these things, I remember… I am blessed. Yes, blessed even within this tough season. Blessed because I’ve experienced such love. Blessed because tomorrow will likely find me loving -and being loved- once again. Yes, I am blessed.
So I reign in my thoughts. I choose to focus on the beautiful treasures tucked within these hard days. I stand together with family and friends, some days more patiently than others, waiting for Elijah to receive his new heart. Loving each other big. Praying non-stop. Soaking in every bit of love and laughter we can find.
Because every day is a gift.
And in the depths of life’s most troublesome circumstances, every single gift counts. Indeed, every bit of goodness matters.
Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. James 1:17 CSB