Today I share a post written by my daughter who is a heart mommy. I was not familiar with this term until a few months ago when my grandson was born with a serious heart defect. Since then, I have come to love and respect this special group of people… these special heart mommies and daddies chosen by God to love on and care for precious children born with heart defects.
“Waking up to feed a baby can get old pretty fast. We crave sleep, and it being interrupted night after night is exhausting. But when I pick him up from his bed and lay him in mine to change his diaper, give meds and his bottle, and he gives me his big, precious, open mouth smile, all my “discomforts” melt away. This little boy holds apart of me that nobody else has ever held. When he finished eating I just laid there with him in my arms smothering him in kisses, which he has gotten very good at returning, and I couldn’t keep my mind away from the “what ifs”. With his second surgery probably not too far off, it’s getting hard to not worry about him. There have been so many babies pass recently because of a heart defect, and many had the same one Elijah has, it makes me fear for him, for his future. I hold him and think “what if I don’t have him to hold much longer” “what if his heart fails” “what if surgery goes wrong” “what if, what if, what if”… What ifs suck.. So tonight I’m trying to remember the better what ifs. “What if I shut my brain up and remember to trust God?” What if I enjoy my special baby and all the joy he brings?” What if ‘I’ stop acting like I have any control over his life?” I breathe a lot easier then. Being a heart mom is so hard, harder than I ever admit. But being a heart mom makes me realize just how precious his life is, and how fragile it is. So as long as he’s still here for me to wake up to feed, and to hold in my arms, I’m gonna remember to appreciate everything about him and leave the uncontrollable things to a God who is so much bigger than my son’s half a heart! A God who will never be shaken. Jeremiah 29:11 says it all.”
Yes, heart moms, all moms- God does have a plan for us, for our children, for our families. May we lean on Him – and on one another- as those plans are fulfilled.
God bless our sweet heart babies.